Right Answers

I spoke yesterday about modeling honesty for our children.  One of the aspects of honesty that I didn’t address, is a child’s innate need to please.  This need for adult approval and acceptance can take several forms.  One way a child can appear to lie, is by changing their responses when questioned.  Desperate to find the right answer, some children will totally change their story or answer to a question, just to please the all powerful adult.  The same adult who once hung over the baby crib gesturing, jabbering and making a sundry silly faces, is now glowering and disapproving.  Tammy doesn’t want mom or dad to be angry.  She desperately wants those approving smiles to return. She will change her answer over and over again in her attempt to hit upon that magic answer.  There are no dark or ulterior motives here, just an innocent child trying to make a parent or teacher happy.  So, if you find yourself in a situation where the “truth” is hard to find, remember that giggling, engaging infant. For unconditional love is the soil from which truth springs.

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