Quiet

I love it late at night and early in the morning when it is quiet and peaceful.  I never fill these quiet hours with obligations or should-dos.  Instead, I give myself permission to do anything I want, including doing nothing at all.  Sleep is more peaceful, my day more serene when I take this time.  It isn’t always easy.  Sometimes I feel pressured by that email that needs sending, those chores that need doing, that book that I should read.  But when I feel that tightening in my chest and that pressure pushing me on, I stop and get very quiet.  Amazingly, the pressure is relieved and I can breathe easily again.

Recently I began taking early morning walks with my twelve year old.  No iPods, no agenda, no purpose to the exercise, just he and I walking.  I’m attempting to model for him the ability to get quiet and allow yourself to feel your body, your emotions, your soul.  He thought it was dumb at first and resisted.  But now, several weeks into it, he looks forward to this time.  The other day when no one was looking, he actually held my hand for the last several yards of our walk.  He didn’t say anything.  I didn’t say anything.  I just felt his hand in mine and gave it a little squeeze and enjoyed the quiet beauty all around us.  Yesterday, I overslept and my son was irritated.  “What happened to our walk,” he challenged me last night.  I apologized, and then walking into the next room, I smiled.

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